[Article] Holy Matrimony: Pastoral approach to the discomforts of time-abuse? – Part III

Ordinarily, no minister takes pleasure in beginning ritual liturgies like holy matrimony without one or both contracting parties. Often, such things happen in instances of blatant disregard for time. Such unfortunate instances, however, are not a justification for liturgical aberration. What then should a presider do, especially when sincerely and pastorally impeded to compromise on time?

Ruling out a presider’s cancellation of a liturgical celebration like matrimony for the fact of provocative delay, there are three basic viable options, within and outside Mass, that may be charitably but firmly discussed and rehearsed with the contracting parties during the preparatory period. Exercising informed pastoral judgments, these options are not to be proposed as the penalties they are not, but as legitimate options conterminous not only to the choice of the contracting parties but also to their punctuality.

First Option: To celebrate the ritual mass of holy matrimony in all its ‘pomp and pageantry’. ‘In the Latin Rite, the celebration of marriage between two Catholic faithful normally takes place during Holy Mass because of the connection of all the sacraments with the Paschal mystery of Christ.

In the Eucharist the memorial of the New Covenant is realized, the New Covenant in which Christ has united himself forever to the Church, his beloved bride for whom he gave himself up.

It is therefore FITTING that the spouses should seal their consent to give themselves to each other through the offering of their own lives by uniting it to the offering of Christ for his Church made present in the Eucharistic sacrifice, and by receiving the Eucharist so that, communicating in the same Body and the same Blood of Christ, they may form but “one body” in Christ (CCC 1621). As dictated by the contracting parties’ time of arrival, matrimony within eucharistic celebration is generally the best option.

Second Option: To celebrate the ritual mass but clinically dispense parts like thurification, prayer of the faithful, offertory, traffic offerings, etc. Thus, without rushing through the essential parts of the celebration (introductory rites [as discussed in Parts I-II], concluding rites, liturgies of the word, matrimony, and Eucharist), the priest would still help connect that lifelong commitment to the Eucharist, which is the source and summit of the Church’s life (SC 10), but without what may be called ‘pomp and pageantry.’ Again, as dictated by the punctuality of the contracting parties, this option may be feasibly decided on.

Third Option: To licitly and validly celebrate the Sacrament without Mass; introductory rites (as discussed in Part I), liturgy of the word, celebration of matrimony, [may distribute communion], and concluding rites.

This option may charitably but firmly be decided on, especially when the contracting parties are suffocatingly late (cf. Order of Celebrating Matrimony 108-115; SC 78]).

Before the day of the celebration, then, it would be proper and right for the presiding minister to have rehearsed the variations in the ceremony with the bride, groom, and other ministers like mass servers, if any (cf. Order of Celebrating Matrimony, 20, 29; SC 78).

And on the day of the celebration, even when the presiding minister has justifiable reasons to not compromise on time due to lateness for instance, any action to be taken should be carefully considered to not be communicated in anger, show of might, or ways that may psychologically impress on the bride, groom, or both that their lifelong commitment might have started on the wrong foot.

Perpetuating the belief in the Church as the mother she is in word and in deed, optics and perception are as important as facts.

Be that as it may, it is worthy to note that this article is not to defend lateness, but in this era where the sacrament of matrimony has become much more delicate and threatened, it is to help safeguard and facilitate the desire of the Church to rightly and charitably stand by those individuals who courageously embrace that sacrament, through thick and thin (cf. Order of Celebrating Matrimony 45, 49, 80, 84).

Thus, ‘inasmuch as it is a sacramental action of sanctification, the celebration of marriage-inserted into the liturgy, which is the summit of the Church’s action and the source of her sanctifying power, must be per se valid, worthy, and fruitful.

This opens a wide field for pastoral solicitude, in order that the needs deriving from the nature of the conjugal covenant, elevated into a sacrament, may be fully met, and also, in order that the Church’s discipline regarding free consent, impediments, the canonical form, and the actual rite of the celebration may be faithfully observed’ ( Familiaris Consortio 67).